💔 Why Boston dating sucks

📣 Calling all hungry college students! Subway is reopening on BU’s campus today at 700 Comm. Ave. To celebrate its “glow up,” if you’re one of the first 200 people there between 1 and 4 p.m., you could win free subs for an entire semester. Might as well roll the dice!

🎂 And a big B-Side b-day shoutout to Leah Dickman! She’s Gia’s roommate, and a loyal B-Sider. You’re the best!

👀 What’s on tap today:

Up first…

Here’s a puzzle: If everyone’s tired of dating apps, why is it still impossible to meet people IRL? One theory is that young people don’t know how to flirt. Specifically, they don’t know how to approach people in-person.

😰 People struggle talking to strangers these days. “People are so anxious about how they're coming off [to others],” said Ashley Kirsner, founder of Skip the Small Talk, which hosts IRL friendship and speed-dating events. “I’m hearing a lot of, like, ‘oh, I shouldn't have, I was so weird. I was so awkward,’” compared to pre-pandemic. Emyli Lovz, founder of EmLovz, a dating coaching service for men, has even added an anxiety coach to her team to help her clients.

💔 Plus, dating apps have us feeling jaded. “Nobody likes going on a dating app,” said Krissy, a.k.a. @narcolpsybetsy, a local influencer who posts about her dating life. According to Kirsner, apps make people into “the worst versions of themselves”: more superficial, less vulnerable, and more likely to reject someone, which makes people pessimistic about dating in general. “[You feel like] ‘the more time I spend on this app, the more I hate people,’” she said. Rough.

💬 That combo makes for some not-so-steamy flirting. All of this anxiety and jadedness leads to folks “taking fewer social risks” in conversations, and putting walls up around themselves, Kirsner said, all of which results in more mild, less direct flirting. “There’s a lot of ‘oh, no, no, no, I'm just kidding,’” in order to protect their feelings. Lovz said that for men, part of the problem is that they’re afraid of “coming off as creepy,” leading them to approach people in a less direct way, which usually has the opposite effect.

😉 The remedy? Be more direct. “It’s half the battle,” Lovz said. “You wanna have a reason to say something to them and you wanna let them know that you're not gonna be there for like 10 minutes just lingering.” One BC professor simply offers students extra credit for going on a date with a romantic interest (spoiler: it usually works out). Sofia Tempestoso, a 25-year-old single Bostonian, takes a different approach: She’ll break the ice by giving someone an easy in, like guessing someone’s age, and approaching them to find out the right answer. Sometimes, it won’t go much further, but other times, they’ll ask to join in the game, or spark a conversation.

🦃 🍽️ If by fam, you mean famished for Thanksgiving food. The Fenway Foodies Club is serving up the ultimate Thanksgiving guide for anyone who wants to skip the kitchen stress and dive straight into The Fenway’s finest feasts this year. From takeout spreads that’ll wow at Friendsgiving to dine-in deals that let the pros handle the cooking, explore the tastiest bites available today and join the Fenway Foodies Club to stay up to date on more delicious news. 

🚿 Gov. Maura Healey wants you to take shorter showers. OK, OK, we’re leaving out some context. On Tuesday, state officials asked residents to take steps toward conserving water, i.e., running dishwashers and washing machines less often, and yes, taking shorter showers. That’s because 1. The drought in Mass. is pretty bad, and 2. Water is needed to help fight the drought-induced wildfire problem, which has even affected Boston (see: this brush fire on BC’s campus). And speaking of fires, officials are also asking folks to practice fire prevention, like not burning things outside.

🚇 The Red Line is *pinches fingers* this close to being slow-zone-free. If you were a victim of the line’s major shutdowns earlier this month, you’ll be happy to know they worked. The MBTA has eliminated five more speed restrictions on the Red Line, bringing its grand total down to (wait for it) … TWO! For a line that started 2024 with 54, that’s not too shabby. The bad news is that Red Liners only get a quick break before their next shutdown on Nov. 18. But the good news is there’s a great chance that it’ll take care of the final two slow zones.

⚽ The Revs are one step closer to their new stadium. On Tuesday, state legislators finalized a compromise on a long-awaited state economic development bill. And inside is language that'll remove a key barrier to the stadium project: A zoning designation as a port area that prevented construction. The final compromise in the bill seems to have made most parties happy, including Mayor Michelle Wu, who petitioned for and ultimately got Boston to get a seat at the table in planning discussions. Now, we just have to hope there aren’t any more snags.

🏀 Surprise! The Celtics are getting a(nother) docu-series. Like we said, championship teams = championship attention. This time, we’re looking at “Celtics City,” a new HBO series. The show will cover the history of the Celtics franchise from fame to flop and back to fame, emphasizing the team’s relationship with Boston and using archived and current interviews with former and current Celtics. “This story is bigger than basketball, and yet, it’s everything you ever loved about basketball, too,” executive producer Bill Simmons said. It’ll premiere sometime in 2025.

One lucky winner will receive two Handel and Haydn Society H² Memberships for Young Adults! To enter, just refer a friend and have them accept your invite by the end of the day on Nov. 15. If you have already referred a friend to B-Side (and they’ve accepted), you're eligible! Full details below*

18+. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. Limit one entry per person. See Official Rules & an additional entry option here.

New England just bagged a three-peat for producing the Sexiest Men Alive. In 2022, it was Chris Evans, a Sudbury native; in 2023, it was Patrick Dempsey, a Lewiston, Maine, native; and this year, it’s the one and only John Krasinski, a Newton native. Or, as you may know him, Jim from “The Office.”

Krasinski is the 40th man to get the honor, about which he said he initially had “Immediate blackout, actually. Zero thoughts.” His cover story describes him as a man who puts family first, despite his overwhelming sexiness. “[He] prefers just being a husband and father, who binges Netflix documentaries and relishes bedtime stories with his kids.”

Unfortunately, unlike Evans, Krasinski didn’t have anything to say about Boston’s sex appeal in his interview. But he did do a brief Boston accent to describe his family’s response to the news.

— Written by Gia Orsino and Emily Schario

🥵 Thanks for reading! Every day that we get to write about the Sexiest Man Alive (which, recently, has been three days) is a good day.

💜 Special shoutout to today’s sponsors, The Fenway and Samuels & Associates, for supporting local journalism and keeping Boston’s foodie community up-to-date on the tastiest trends and hidden gems. 

🧑‍💻 The results are in: 62% of B-Siders report either quiet quitting, quiet vacationing, or both at their jobs. One reader (who hasn’t) said, “What would Davis Clarke say?”

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